my vision of the world.

Feeling bad for not having a boy/girlfriend?

Today we celebrate St Anthony’s, in north america we pray for him in order to find stuff we’ve lost but here in Brazil we pray to “find” a husband/wife. That’s why the day we celebrate those who are in love is on the 12th of June and not on the day before St. Valentine.

So, these last couple weeks people were talking about their boyfriends and girlfriends, about what they were going to give as a present, but I’ve seen some people feeling bad because they didn’t have a boyfriend (sorry girls but it was mostly a girl thing). I’ve found a phrase, which I published on my Facebook wall that says something like this (it was in Portuguese): “I’m not spending that day with a girlfriend, I never look for an Indian on Indian’s day or for a tree on tree’s day” That may sound like I’m trying to find some consolation around, which wasn’t the point. After that remembered, through a post of a friend, of a saying I’ve found a long time ago on  Jacilyn Rae’s blog that says “A woman’s heart should be so lost in God, that a man must seek Him to find her.” I’ve found it so true that I started praying right away, when I say praying I don’t mean making an elaborate prayer with a lot of words, I mean just the quiet feeling of God’s presence and peace.

That’s what I’m looking for in a woman. Maybe this is my dream of a “Princess charming” and I must accept a not-so-close-to-God king of girl and walk with her towards Him. But it gave me a lot of consolation remembering of the passage where Jesus says: “seek his kingdom, and these other things will be given you besides”(Lc 12, 31). That’s why I don’t bother at all not having a girlfriend on this day, because I Know the one I want is very close to God’s heart and He’ll show me when its the good moment.

Talking with two of my girl friends, we came to the point of differences between sexes and I have to admit beauty attracts men but that’s not the only thing that attracts us. They were saying that sometimes(it happened more than once) when getting into a party they drew attention and men came to ask them if they were “believers” (!), as they answered yes, those same guys told them to go away cause they deserved better than what they were going to find there. That was of course an opportunity to evangelize but it shows that even those guys that were only looking for a girl to spend the night with, value women with content specially Christian ones. (Of course I’m talking about Brazilians, we still are a very Christian Country)

I can say the same for me; if I find a “princess” and I see she’s not even looking for God, if she’s not interested in prayer she’ll push me away without noticing. For that very reason I’ll not look for the “woman of my dreams” in a pub or a club. So as I know there are a lot of Catholic women looking for their “prince charming” here’s my advice for you: While caring for your beauty care for your spiritual life. Go out and have fun, but engage yourselves in the church and you’ll find the guy you’re looking for… but please leave the seminarians alone! Last but not least ask yourselves about celibacy for the Kingdom of God, even if that’s not your vocation that will make you pray and that will bring the right guy.



One response

  1. Susan

    “Seek his kingdom, and these other things will be given you besides” is good advice for women looking for a man of high quality. (I’ll remember that on Valentine’s Day!) Women who look after their spiritual life will not be so desperate and disappointed in not having someone on these days because they trust God.

    Thanks for mentioning Jacilyn Rae’s blog…I didn’t know about it.


    14/06/2011 at 1:32 am

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