my vision of the world.

No one is meant to be with me :)

Last week I was talking with a good friend of mine about vocation and state of life, and a subject came up. Some people believe that God has created two people to each other in other words they were meant to be together. We both agreed that we don’t agree with that. I believe that when God created myself He gave me my masculinity as part of who I am, He gave me also my vocation to Shalom Community also as part of who I am but also as my way to walk through this life towards holiness and eternal life, and finally He called me to a specific state of life as the way I’m going to serve him better in this life once in the next we’re all going to be celibates. (Just a good thing to remember: He’s called me before life events could hurt me so I can’t pass trough a discernment seeing only the wounds life gave me… but this is a theme for another post).

People who believe God created two people to each other may say: If God thought about that many details why wouldn’t He think about one person for me to be happy with in marriage (if marriage is my state of life of course)? Because in order to be fully happy we’d have to be entirely in God’s plans and it depends on my listening to Him and corresponding with His will. So if I don’t say yes to my personal vocation I won’t be as happy as I could because it will be lacking something of His plans for me. (It doesn’t mean that I won’t be happy outside of His will, I just won’t be as happy as I’d be inside of it). Therefore, if that person God chose for me says no to His plans I won’t be as whole as I could be because of someone else’s fault. I don’t believe God thinks this way.

That would imply fate or destiny. I’ve talked about this in other posts, I believe God knows the way things will happen because He can foresee all of the consequences of each and every decision of ours at every split of second. But the decisions are still ours. So I believe that people may cross our lives with God’s knowledge and permission and they might be “the one” for us but not because He imposes us this one but because He knows this one is a good “half” for us. Still this isn’t our only choice.


4 responses

  1. Susan

    So if I’m following you…because God has foresight, if one “soulmate” says no to God’s plan for a good partner, then that relationship is not the end of God’s plan…God knew the person was going to say no and now has something else in mind for the two people?

    22/03/2011 at 11:50 pm

    • Our perception of time makes it difficult to “see” the way God is in control of each and every situation…
      His plan is for me to be Happy (saved) and He has to adapt it at every decision of mine. But it doesn’t mean that His plan changes.

      If He made me to be a priest and I get married He’ll do everything for me to be happy in the state of life I chose, but I would be way happier if I’d say yes to His call to priesthood.

      I don’t believe He goes that specific when creating someone to be married with me. He created me to serve Him in a married state but I should choose the person. In His providence He shows me some people and accordingly to our responses to His grace He’ll fulfill His promises of happiness and holiness to us.

      That gets a little complicated when I have a specific vocation (like Shalom); I know I’d be a better server of the Lord with my family if I could found some shalom woman to be married with. Here we go back to saying yes to God’s plans cause if I’m Shalom I can only be fully happy saying yes to this vocation and live it fully. So it is with my wife, and what if she says no to Her vocation am I going to be less happy because of someone else said no? According to people who think I was meant to be with that one the answer has to be yes. But If I believe there is no such previous election I’ll look for someone who said yes and I’ll be very happy with that one.

      So as God is outside the time my decisions and their consequences aren’t a big deal for Him but for me they are my happiness.

      23/03/2011 at 8:15 am

  2. Susan

    Thanks, Felipe. So, if your calling is married life, then no one is meant to be with you but you were meant to be with someone? 🙂

    23/03/2011 at 11:59 am

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