What to do between two relationships?
This is a very personal answer to a comment in the post about starting a new relationship. What to do between two relationships? I wrote about finishing one, starting a new one but in between? I don’t have all the answers but I have my opinion which has proven to be valid for some people that’s why I’m writing again…
I think there are some stages of engagement and levels of “mourning” (if I can use this word for the feeling we endure after breaking up… )
The first moment really depends on how you ended. If it was both or just one of you who decided to break up. If it came out of nowhere or if you’ve seen it coming… but I think the first moment is always to suffer the separation… to rethink the plans without the other… to accept that is over and to let the pain goes lighter to carry on.
I want to make clear that there’s no measure of time during these moments because it depends on ones feelings and this is too personal for me to say how long does it take to heal a wound.
I think the second moment is to move on. Accepting it is over continuing with our lives. Make plans, start new projects. But most important stay single! It is important to have a time for yourself. I don’t think it’s good for nobody to search another person to forget the one we had two weeks before. There is no feeling of self-sufficiency its just not fair to the new person to show affections we don’t yet have cause its impossible… Some of the most important things in life is to have it in our hands so we can be able to hand it to the One and the ones we love. If I don’t master my feelings it becomes difficult to give them to someone. So take a time to reassemble yourself.
Next moment. Don’t go hunting! Well to “hunt down” a boy/girlfriend is not a good idea… first because it might scare someone who’s close to us and may be interested. This behavior just shows a small lack of confidence in God who has just the right person for us, and pushes away a person who might be interested but “not so fast”.
So don’t go hunting but what to do?
A couple things, first live intensely your friendships and be open to new ones. We can kind of chose the perspective boy/girlfriends but in the same way we choose our friends. I think we can also be attentive to the signs and give an appropriate answer to those we get closer to. I don’t think it’s fair to show interest or feed the person with hopes of something more when we know we don’t feel the same way the person is showing to us. But at the same time why not give some signs of interest when we are…
When the sings are given and the answers are positive I think its time to read the post about starting a new relationship.