my vision of the world.

A Prince Charming? No, A Man of God. (a woman’s response)

In response to my post “The Prince Charming”

Here is a feminine vision of the history by Denise Landim.
I want to make clear that the goal here is not to destroy the memory of our “sweet girl dreams” and neither discourage people who watch romantic comedies (I particularly like them too). But I would put a more real vision of what a Christian woman called to marriage, expect or should expect form someone with whom she wants to build a future and be unite with forever.

A Man of God

An overwhelming passion, an unforgettable love and dream wedding, it is difficult to find any woman who doesn’t want that. It’s also difficult to find someone who doesn’t want to live a “romantic comedy” that ends with that kiss in the rain or the” happily ever after”, after all, at all times and in all forms, films and TV insist on promoting the dream of  “the Prince Charming” and the “Fairy Tale”. Often, ourselves, we feed the idea of a perfect relationship with someone perfect who loves us perfectly.

But real love, the one for the whole life, in the real world, it needs more than beautiful eyes, charming smile and a flower on the first date.It needs more than just opening the car door and to remember the anniversaries of  the first date. Gestures of kindness and attention are important to nurture a relationship, they certainly are, but they aren’t enough to make it last.

When we know the Great Love Of Our Lives, the One who surpasses all our expectations, the one that fills us with care, attention, the one who loves us just as we need to be loved, the expected “Prince” turns into a frog and what we seek in a relationship changes. God changes everything! I still want to get married, but not for my own happiness, that too, but that, first, I make the other happy and for us build a holy family. The inversion of values is large, even though the romance still there, and I think it’s important to keep it up and make it resist to the end.

Really? Christian women who want to build a saint family seek a man of God rather than a character in a novel. We want respect more than charm and prefer a God-fearing heart than any wealth. We expect and hope for someone we can trust more than someone who has a well defined body. We expect loyalty and we promise unconditional support. We want someone who, despite his weaknesses, is a fighter(!) rather than someone with a mask of perfection. We accept mistakes when we are not only wanted because of the measure of our waists. We are capable of a great love when we have a “three way” relationship (me you and God ). Ah! And we know that we will not find a spouse who is already a saint (isn’t it women?), but we seek a husband who wants a lot to be one. We would rather build a saint than finding one ready. Women of God do not fear an unfinished work, we fear having to finish it alone.

We really need to ask God constantly and with great faith, the grace to learn to love others as He loves us. For men and women, this will always be the great challenge and at the same time, the right measure for the true “Happily Ever After.”

Here is the original in Portuguese:
http://deniselandimsh.blogspot.com/2010/11/um-principe-encantado-nao-um-homem-de.html

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3 responses

  1. Susan

    I like that Denise says she doesn’t want to get married just for her happiness but primarily to make the other person happy and to build a holy family. That is counter-cultural, but it’s what true love is about. :) I think she would be a good speaker to young women. Also to men who have grown cynical about women (so that they know the qualities of a godly woman).

    18/11/2010 at 12:49 am

    • Hi Susan,
      I can tell she is a great speaker, to the youth in general.
      she is invited all the time to speak to youth of the parishes here in Fortaleza.
      Thank you for commenting.
      Shalom!

      18/11/2010 at 6:54 am

  2. Pingback: The Prince Charming « Something and nothing about everything

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